Understand Parental Alienation. Read Between the Lines. There Are HUGE Spaces...
Let me borrow from a post I just did on this matter:
A father was convicted of child pornography offenses a couple of years ago.
His wife left him.
Subsequently, the father has been trying to get access to his children.
The court previously found that he had behaved inappropriately in bed with one of the children.
But JUDGE ROBERT BENJAMIN ordered that the two children, who are girls aged 8 and 10, spend weekends with their father.
Eldest daughter is afraid.
To facilitate the father's rights, JUDGE ROBERT BENJAMIN orders that:
1. the girls sleep in the same bedroom (to "support" each other), and
2. the father place a lock on the bedroom door for the girls
3. the father have an adult friend stay overnight when the girls are present
Additionally, some UNNAMED Family Court counselor has stated that the girls don't pose a risk to the father, at their current ages, when they are awake, clothed, and together.
Wait a minute!"Awake, clothed and together"? Isn't that the spiel they give us women-folk for rape-prevention measures? Never mind that this notion of security is false in stranger rapes and so should be presumed to be false for non-stranger rape as well.
Guess who supports JUDGE ROBERT BENJAMIN's order?
John Abbott from the fathers' rights group Blackshirts says the court has taken all precautions to protect the children.
"What we have here is a situation where there's no real allegation that the court has found against the father molesting his own children," he said.
"And we have to keep in mind that alienating children from parents is a very serious matter."
Alienation. Parental alienation. We keep telling you. We keep trying to show you what this is about. Parental alienation is a claim made by fathers, to benefit fathers, that masks child sexual abuse--just as false memory syndrome has done to adult survivors.
This case doesn't have a gawddamn thing to do with alienation. The father is convicted of child pornography. The daughter doesn't want to visit overnight. The court is overruling the child's desires and best interest in the name of the father.
In the words of Dr. Richard Gardner, father of parental alienation syndrome:
“There is no question that abuse cases are ‘turn ons’ for the wide variety of individuals involved in them, the accuser(s), the prosecutors, the lawyers, the judges, the evaluators, the psychologists, the reporters, the readers of the newspapers, and everyone else involved— except for the falsely accused and the innocent victim . . . Everyone is getting their ‘jollies,’ except the two central figures, who are not only getting little if any sexual pleasure out of the whole thing but whose lives are being destroyed in the process.”
RICHARD A. GARDNER, SEX ABUSE HYSTERIA: THE SALEM WITCH TRIALS REVISITED 31 (1991)
“Judges are not free from the psychopathological mechanisms. . . They too may have repressed pedophilic impulses over which there is suppression, repression, and guilt. Inquiry into the details of the case provides voyeuristic and vicarious gratifications. . . Incarcerating the alleged perpetrator may serve psychologically to obliterate the judge’s own projected pedophilic impulses.”
RICHARD A. GARDNER, SEX ABUSE HYSTERIA: THE SALEM WITCH TRIALS REVISITED 107 (1991).
Special care should be taken not alienate the child from the molesting parent. The removal of a pedophilic parent from the home "should only be seriously considered after all attempts at treatment of the pedophilia and rapprochement with the family have proven futile."
Gardner, R.A. (1992). True and False Accusations of Child Sex Abuse . Cresskill, NJ: Creative Therapeutics.(p. 537)
The child should be told that there is no such thing as a perfect parent. "The sexual exploitation has to be put on the negative list, but positives as well must be appreciated"
Gardner, R.A. (1992). True and False Accusations of Child Sex Abuse . Cresskill, NJ: Creative Therapeutics.(p. 572)
Older children may be helped to appreciate that sexual encounters between an adult and a child are not universally considered to be reprehensible acts. The child might be told about other societies in which such behavior was and is considered normal. The child might be helped to appreciate the wisdom of Shakespeare's Hamlet, who said, "Nothing's either good or bad, but thinking makes it so."
Gardner, R.A. (1992). True and False Accusations of Child Sex Abuse . Cresskill, NJ: Creative Therapeutics.(p. 59)
"In such discussions the child has to be helped to appreciate that we have in our society an exaggeratedly punitive and moralistic attitude about adult-child sexual encounters"
Gardner, R.A. (1992). True and False Accusations of Child Sex Abuse . Cresskill, NJ: Creative Therapeutics.(p. 572).
"He must learn to control himself if he is to protect himself from the Draconian punishments meted out to those in our society who act out their pedophilic impulses."
Gardner, R.A. (1992). True and False Accusations of Child Sex Abuse . Cresskill , NJ: Creative Therapeutics. (pp. 585-592)
And there is another case (like I said before, one of many): Yet ANOTHER family court outrage: 6-year-old girl ordered to live with dad despite child porn fears (Sydney, Australia)
God bless the children.
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